Your Partner’s Role During Labour: Dos and Don’ts for a Positive Birth Experience
- Donna Cox
- Aug 18
- 4 min read
Updated: Sep 2
If you’re pregnant and planning your big day, you’ve probably thought about your role during labour. But have you considered your partner’s role? As a maternity nurse and birth educator, I’ve seen partners absolutely shine in the birth room. However, I’ve also witnessed them (accidentally!) make things harder.
That’s why I’ve pulled together my top birth room dos and don’ts for partners. These tips will help you both feel confident and supported. Whether you’re attending Antenatal Classes Auckland or just starting to prepare, these insights will help you work as a team. Let’s keep the vibe calm, connected, and positive!
1. DO Learn What’s Actually Helpful
Partners often want to help but aren’t sure how. That’s where preparation comes in! Learn simple comfort measures. Techniques like counter pressure, breathing cues, and helping your partner change positions can offer real, effective support.
Pro Tip: In my Antenatal Classes Auckland, we practice hands-on techniques. Partners leave feeling confident and ready. You’ll learn exactly what you should be doing and at what stage of labour—no guesswork needed!
2. DON’T Take It Personally
Labour can be intense. Sometimes, women want silence; other times, they need reassurance. If she suddenly doesn’t want to be touched or tells you to “stop talking,” it’s not about you. It’s about what her body and mind need in that moment.
3. DO Advocate for Her
In the birth room, you can be her voice while she focuses on contractions. This might mean asking questions, reminding the team of her preferences, or requesting a moment for you both to talk before a decision is made.
Bonus: In Antenatal Classes Ponsonby and Antenatal Classes Silverdale, we cover birth plans and how to speak up respectfully in a medical setting.
4. DON’T Get Stuck on Your Phone
Checking sports scores or scrolling Instagram? Not the vibe! Your focus should be 100% on her. Keep your phone use for quick updates to family or snapping a photo when she’s happy for it. Otherwise, be present.
5. DO Stay Calm and Positive
Your energy is contagious! If you’re anxious, she’ll feel it. If you’re calm, you’ll help her feel safe. Learn how to breathe with her, offer grounding touch, and keep your tone steady and reassuring.
6. DON’T Forget Your Own Needs
Birth can be a long journey. Remember to eat, drink, and take short breaks when you can. A fainting partner isn’t helpful for anyone! We talk about partner self-care in Antenatal Classes Birkenhead and Antenatal Classes Point Chevalier. You want to be at your best for her!
Why Antenatal Classes Matter for Both of You
When you both know what to expect, labour becomes a team effort—not a guessing game. My Antenatal Classes Auckland are designed for couples. You’ll both feel prepared, informed, and confident walking into the birth room. We cover everything from labour positions to partner advocacy. This way, you know exactly how to support (and not annoy!) your partner on the big day.
You’ll receive a birth partner cheatsheet, so you walk away feeling ready and knowing your role. You won’t feel like a spare part; you’ll know exactly how to support her and WHY you are doing what you are doing.
The Importance of Communication
Effective communication is key during labour. It’s essential for both partners to express their feelings and needs. This can help reduce anxiety and create a supportive environment.
How to Communicate Effectively
Use Clear Language: When discussing preferences or concerns, be clear and concise. Avoid jargon that might confuse your partner or the medical team.
Listen Actively: Pay attention to your partner’s cues. Sometimes, a simple nod or a squeeze of the hand can convey more than words.
Check In Regularly: Ask your partner how she’s feeling throughout the process. This shows you care and are engaged.
FAQs
Q: Do partners need to attend antenatal classes?
A: Yes! They’ll learn exactly how to support you physically and emotionally—and feel less like a spare part on the day.
Q: My partner is nervous about birth. How can antenatal classes help?
A: Knowledge reduces fear. We break down the stages of labour, what to expect, and how to work together so your partner feels confident.
Q: Can I still come to class if my partner can’t make it?
A: Absolutely! You can bring another support person, and you’ll both leave with the same skills and knowledge.
Q: Do you run classes in multiple locations?
A: Yes! We offer Antenatal Classes Ponsonby, Antenatal Classes Silverdale, Antenatal Classes Birkenhead, and Antenatal Classes Point Chevalier.
Conclusion: Your Journey Together
If you want to feel like a connected, confident team on your baby’s birthday, join one of my modern, one-day Antenatal Classes Auckland. You’ll both leave knowing exactly how to support each other every step of the way.
Remember, this is a journey you’re taking together! Embrace the experience, and don’t hesitate to reach out for support. You’ve got this!
By Donna
Antenatal Classes Auckland
Mothers Group Auckland
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